We are not born hating our bodies, we are taught to hate them. I feel like all I can remember from when I was little were magazines bashing women for having perfectly normal bodies, and this leeched through into society pretty fast. It was a horrible thing to look back on and has undoubtedly caused a lot of people a lot of harm. This blog post is all about ways we can show our body some love, and even though you may not be in a place of love with your body, your body still deserves it. If you don’t have time to read this article in full, please skip to the end where I've done a little round-up of each section.
Feel With Kindness
When was the last time you felt your body? We are humans, we love and understand the power of touch. So, how do we feel with kindness? A good first step, if you’re not too comfortable touching your body, is to moisturize. The right amount of touch but with purpose! A time for self-care. Set a little time aside and pamper yourself. Use your favourite moisturizer, clean your nails and paint them, exfoliate, and whenever you’re ready to, actually touch your body, understand what it feels like. All of your lumps and bumps, your curves, your dimples. Getting to know our bodies in this way can help us nurture a better relationship with it.
Why not try speaking affirmations to yourself whilst holding your body? Affirmations like "I'm not perfect, but my body is perfectly me. And that's enough.". "I love myself, no matter what shape or size I am. Because I am more than my body.". "My body is beautiful because it's mine. And I choose to love and care for it every day.". You can say them out loud or just to yourself. And when you’re ready, why not get a little spicy - I mean, it releases dopamine, and can do wonders for our mental and emotional well-being, so why not?!
Move With Joy
I’ve always been made to feel that movement or exercise is a punishment for how my body looks, not to celebrate moving my body or what it can actually do. Years ago if I was to work out, go to the gym or exercise, it was because I thought I needed to change my body and lose weight. It has never been with joy or appreciation for my body, it was always to change.
It’s been a long road to finding a kind of movement that I enjoy doing because I enjoy the way my body feels when doing it. For me this is swimming, going for big walks, and yoga. These are the things I love doing to help me form a better connection to my body, my mind, and my spirit. I don’t like to view these as forms of exercise because I’ve still got a long way to go with dismantling exercise = weight loss, because it doesn’t, so I like to call it joyful movement because they do bring me joy when I partake in them.
It can take a while to find out what kind of movement brings you joy, so I would say start small if you’re not sure where to start. Maybe it’s a short walk, maybe it IS a session at the gym, maybe it’s a dance video on youtube, maybe it’s rock climbing. Whatever forms of movement you enjoy doing, take note of them, notice how you feel when you participate in them, and if they bring you joy, why not try to do them more often?
Dress With Comfort
In the past year or so I feel like I’ve really started to understand my own personal style a little better. I like to be comfortable when I wear clothes. I like to look cute and be comfy. And what I’ve also come to understand is that there is a connection between our bodies and how we choose to dress ourselves. We can show our bodies love by dressing with comfort, by dressing our bodies joyfully. And I know you’ve felt this before when you’ve put on your favourite outfit, and you just feel GOOD. There are a few pieces of clothing that I have that make me feel like that too.
Finding clothes that make you feel good, both in comfort and in your soul is wonderful. Gone are the days when we wear skinny jeans that are way too tight for us or hold on to clothing that is too small because ‘last year it fit me perfectly’. You deserve clothes that fit you, make you feel good, and are comfortable. Take note of the clothes that you feel good in and make new outfits based around that one pair of jeans you really love, or that top that makes you feel great. Do you like to dress colourfully, or are you more of a neutral colour palette? Have some fun!
Eat With Nourishment
This is something I have been really trying my best to work on recently. I have a history of disordered eating, so food and how it makes me feel has been a rocky subject because I used to get almost all of my comfort from eating food and it got to a point of me having some really unhealthy habits.
But what I’ve tried to work into my thinking patterns when it comes to eating is ‘is this going to nourish me?’. And what I mean by that is, is this going to nourish my body, my mind, my soul? Is this going to make me feel good in aspects other than comfort and fullness? Will I feel energised after this, will I feel like my body has gotten some good stuff from this?
I feel like the food that really does this for me is Japanese food, I love trying to recreate a bento or a ramen. I feel like they have such well-balanced foods and meals, so that’s something I try to recreate at home.
I feel like this mindset is half ‘how does this make me feel?’ and half ‘does this nourish me in more ways than one?’. The foods I try to eat a lot of mostly make me feel good, but also have a good mix of nourishing foods in them too. Because I never want to restrict myself, I feel like that could be a rocky path to get on, so I try to avoid doing or saying anything like that. I try to eat as much fresh food as I can, but it is often a struggle because fresh food is expensive. But you know, sometimes a frozen pizza or a 30p noodle sachet is what I need for my bank balance and my soul, you know?
Live With Love
This may sound a little vague, and to be honest, it really is, but I noticed a huge shift in how I viewed my body when I just decided to start being kinder; when I indulged in things I loved to do, when I spent more time with the people I love. I feel like when you lead with love in your life, everything around you gets better, or at least feels better.
And I know that this is a very privileged thing to say because not everyone has good mental health to just start seeing the world through the lens of love. So we’ll start with trying to find the little joys, it can be feeling the warm sunshine on your face. It could be hearing the birds sing in the morning. It could be taking time to really appreciate your afternoon cup of tea.
It’s difficult - all of the things I have listed are difficult if you do not have the access to things that make you feel good, clothes that fit you, money for fresh food, and so on. I'm not going to sit here and tell you to ‘just be happy’ and then you’ll miraculously end up in love with your body. Like a lot of things, this takes work, and it won't be instant either. But what we can do, as I said earlier, is start small. You’ve got this.
So a recap on how we can show our bodies some love:
We can Feel With Kindness by
purposeful touch, such as moisturising
a pamper session
say kind body affirmations
some spicy time
We can move with joy by:
Viewing exercise as a joyful movement
Trying to realise that exercise does not have to equal weight loss
Find what movement brings you the most joy
We can dress with comfort by
Finding our favourite outfits that make us feel good
Replace or upcycle clothes that no longer fit us.
Make new outfits based around a beloved item
We can eat with nourishment by:
Eating foods that are nutritious AND comforting
Eating intuitively
Eating foods that feel your soul as well as your appetite
We can live with love by:
Trying our best to be kinder to ourselves
Indulge in activities that you love
Spend more time with those you love
Find the little joys in the everyday
Thank you so much for reading, and if you have any of your own ways that you show your body some love, then please leave them in the comments so we can all share our ideas together.
Kayleigh x
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